It is often stated that the best way to judge a man is by his questions rather than his answers. If you’re not advancing in your career, business, or relationship, it could be because you’re not asking the right questions.
Did you know that you could get into trouble by asking the wrong questions? You need to master the art of asking the right questions.
Unfortunately, you might not be receiving the necessary feedback to correct your behavior. The guide below illustrates how asking questions can keep you out of trouble.
What do you want?
When you ask a question, be sure of what you want for an answer. Sometimes, you might want someone’s opinion. As you prepare to ask the question, make sure you have the right source fully aware of your expectations from them. Determine if:
- You want an expert opinion
- You want a well-reasoned judgment
- You need a factually correct answer
After ascertaining the information you need to ask, you can use these techniques to draw out what you need to know:
1) Don’t be shallow
Dig deeper by asking follow-up questions. If you’re not looking for facts, then there will always be a degree of assumption in the answer you receive. Ask them a follow-up question like “what do you think?” Follow-up questions provide insight and enable you to make sound opinions about situations.
2) Don’t ask yes or no questions
A yes or no question will most often get you incomplete information. Use open-ended questions to get you additional information and details you might have never known existed. Ladies who’d like to take their relationship to the next level could benefit from knowing the right questions to ask a guy and some of the best conversation techniques.
Questions with “would” or “do you think” should be avoided and more emphasis should be placed on questions with “how,” “what” or “where” if you want some thought to answers and more information.
3) Use the power of silence
Most of the times, the respondent will likely bring out more information when you wait. Begin by asking the question, then wait for the response. After listening to the reaction, wait some more. Be comfortable with the silent period as it may serve to fill the gaps in the conversation and bring out some vital bits of information you seek.
4) Don’t interrupt
Interrupting the person with whom you’re talking to could be telling him/her that you don’t value what he is saying. It could also drive the conversation the way you want and not necessarily the way it should go. After asking your question, give the respondent time to answer in full even if you’re not getting the answer you want. If you’re not satisfied with the response, incorporate the same topic in the next question after a natural pause.
If you’re running out of time, and the person has wandered away from the topic, you have the right to interrupt politely. Doing so will show the person that you respect what they’re saying. You can say something like “what I heard you say is…” as you redirect them to the matter at hand.
As you advance in your quest for knowledge, remember that asking the right questions is a skill just like any other skill and takes practice. You won’t get it perfect in every outing, but if you keep persisting, your skills will improve drastically. Ask the right questions and stay out of trouble.