Valentine’s day can be a stressful time. You want a gift that is heartfelt yet valuable, poignant and yet not too over-the-top, because that will only ignite suspicion (am I right guys? I hear you all saying “Preach”). Gift giving is a minefield, especially on a day as important as this one. However, instead of focusing on the baubles and bows, why not focus on the emotionally rewarding gifts you can bestow on your beloved? And not just on February 14th, but every day. Love becomes incredibly complicated when we forget that its purpose is to be enjoyed and provide enjoyment. That sounds so simple doesn’t it? Sadly, our present society’s unyielding attempt to overanalyze, misconstrue and eradicate the kindness in ANYTHING makes Valentine’s day a celebration of meaningless crap as opposed to a time to express gratitude and affection for your significant other.
But, the truth is, emotionally fulfilling gifts are much cheaper and much more rewarding for your gal in the long run. They also have the added bonus of improving the quality of your overall relationship. A box of chocolates and a teddy bear full of batteries doesn’t say much when you drop them off at the speed of light while you’re running errands. And dinner and a night on the town can be pretty boring, even for the most adventurous couples. Valentine’s day is, and should be, special for lovers; it should be a feeling that lasts throughout the year, that gets you through the rough patches and helps you remember why you said “I do”. It’s time to bring back the personal touch—if you’re relationship isn’t personal, then it isn’t much of a relationship. Here are four ways to make every day Valentine’s day:
1) Leave your phone at home
Pretty simple, huh? Well, you’d be surprised how difficult most men will find this task.
I don’t mean put it on silent; I don’t mean put it in the car. I mean, literally, leave the damn thing at home, both of you. A great thing happens when your phone doesn’t distract you–you actually talk. Now, I know most guys are with a woman that they enjoy being with, but still, the pressure to be better, to be informed, to be cooler, sometimes find its direct path by our phones. You may love your wife but stressing about work by bringing your phone EVERYWHERE (even though it’s because you want to continuously achieve things in order for her to be proud of you) will only show her the opposite. Leave it at home; get lost without the GPS, have an adventure together.
2) Indulge in something together
There’s something about sharing a vice with someone else that brings you closer and makes you feel connected. It could be trash TV, sharing a cigar or buying a gumball machine. You could simply eat junk together; put on jeans and t-shirts and go cover yourself in ribs or chocolate cake. Tell her she’s beautiful as she stuffs handfuls of fries down her gullet. Any woman who can take down a burger with no insecurity IS beautiful.
3) Read a Book together
Today’s culture is terrified of reading a book; it’s time-consuming and has no pictures. However, it’s a perfect way to calm your mind and boost your brainpower AND provides a unique opportunity to get to know your lady. Reading a book together is a lost art. No, you don’t have to sit side by side in linen outfits with a bowl of blueberries. Check out two copies from the library, or download it onto your kindle and read it separately.
I can tell you from experience, that this is a really, really lovely thing to do, especially if you take a lot of business trips. It’s nice to have something new to talk about and it’s nice to know that you guys are individually investing in a similar piece of entertainment. Pick a story that will hold your interest and AVOID biographies.
4) Spend at least one night a week in the bedroom
Come home from work with take-out and go straight to the bedroom. No TV, no work and no finishing of arguments or intense discussions you may have started that morning. Hang out, crack jokes, give massages, fool around, talk about your day or simply hang out in silence, but STAY in the bedroom. Just focus on enjoying each other. You’ll be surprised at how your wife will start preparing for this, i.e. primping, trying on cute pajamas. She might actually genuinely smile when you get home. Make her a priority and she will make it well worth your time.
All of the above-mentioned ways rely on you making a personal commitment and sacrifice of your time to the one you love. And since Valentine’s Day is rooted in the idea of sacrifice, which is the root of love, they provide the perfect way to show your affection. Taking distractions out of the equation and spending actual time together goes a long way in repairing marital issues you may not be aware of yet. These are also prime ways to pave a clear path for communication by showing compassion, interest and support. So get to loving.