how to get a second date

how to get a second date

Your hands are sweating, she’s already five minutes late and you’re still not sure if she’s even going to look like her online profile.

With a tap on your shoulder and a quick turn, you feel a rush of relief. She looks better than you could have imagined… The night flies by, and after a few hours of flowing conversation and lots of laughs, she agrees to come back to your place for some coffee.

It’s at this moment that you realize that you have to do everything in your power to make sure that this girl leaves satisfied, because you think she could be the one. “Is the apartment even clean? Did I move that dirty pair of underwear from the bathroom? Do I even have a bottle of wine to open? I should have been more prepared.”

Don’t leave these things to chance. Here’s 6 things you can do to ensure that when the moments right, she’s going to have a fantastic time, begging you to have her back for more.

Note! Before we start, the below tips are assuming you did well during the meal/movie/convo and actually have her coming back to your place for a drink. For tips on how to crush it during the actual date, check out Jo’s article What to Talk About on a First Date. So with that, here is how to make sure you don’t blow it in the 9th inning and have her coming back or seconds.

1) Make sure your place is clean

Rule # 1: Have a clean apartment. (All the time! You never know when you are going to have an unexpected visitor)

Besides the fact that you should always have a clean apartment for your own mental health, you should definitely tidy up before going out on a date for the chance that things take a turn for the best.

There’s no point in putting in your best work all night just to have it squandered by the empty pizza boxes and dirty socks on your living room floor.

All it takes to have a place worthy of any lady is to get rid of the clutter, and adopt a less is more attitude. You don’t need anything fancy to let her know you have your shit together. A simple clean place with solid Feng Sui will do just that.

Check out some of these bachelor pads for inspiration.

2) Have some cocktails to drink

Doriean was spot on when she wrote about this a few months ago. She stressed the fact of how having something nice for a girl to drink when you bring her back is essential. No PBR cans here, save those for the boys. You can check the whole article out here.

Having a nice bottle of wine, or knowledge of some bad ass mixed drinks will make her feel fancy, and that she’s being treated. It will also show your sophisticated side.

Also, don’t forget about the glass wear. Make sure you have a nice set and you should be good to go.

Again, for some great drink recipe’s check out Doriean’s article here.

3) Have some go to music to set the mood

Music activates all sorts of emotions and can really set the mood.

Don’t opt for anything cheesy like Barry Manalo’s let’s get it on, but instead just find something you like that will be a good background music to a nice conversation.

Everyone is different, but for general living room talk I like “The Killers” radio on Pandora, and when things head to the bedroom I personally like to play a little chill dubstep, or chillstep if you will, with just beats and melodies. Try this album on 8tracks: http://8tracks.com/longenuity/chilltopia-2. I find it really releases any nerves and just lets things flow.

While this is great for my generation and vibes, you may need to find something that works for you.

But I really find sex to be much more passionate and intense with some music on in the background, you just sort of get lost in it. It can make the whole experience more memorable for the both of you.

If you don’t have a decent sound system, you can grab one for relatively cheap. I have the Bose SoundLink Mini and it never lets me down. Its extremely small, plays everything wirelessly through Bluetooth, and sounds amazing all for $200. There’s really no need for surround sound systems with new technology.

4) Be prepared, have condom’s

When the time’s right, there is nothing worse than reaching for the dresser table and being unprepared. You may never get this chance again.

Carry an assortment of condoms, but don’t overdo it with a visible basket right next to your bed. A small case with about 20 in your dresser is fine.

It shows her you practice safe sex but you are not an absolute manwhore 7 days of the week..

5) Know your way around the sheets

This is game time. All the other stuff is negligible if you can excel strongly in this area. If you rock her world, leaving her orgasm’ed into a coma, she is likely going to forget about the untidy bathroom she may have stepped into.

Sadly though, this is where most guys struggle. Let’s start off right away and say this doesn’t mean being overly sized down there. The average man can make a girl scream with pleasure if he knows what he’s doing. If your issues in the bedroom stem from the size of your manhood, then you are probably watching too much porn and are trapped under the belief that you need to be huge to satisfy women. Don’t forget, no matter how many people tell you they are packing heat, the average size of a male penis is 5.5” and the average vagina is from 3-7” deep. So squash those issues.

If you aren’t confident in your abilities then grab a book or two. Learn something. The Multi-Orgasmic Man by Mantak Chia is a great place to start. It’s got everything you need to know to last ages in the bedroom, stop premature ejaculation, satisfy women orally and through penetration, and even become multi-orgasmic. For an article on how to achieve this click here.

Chances are she hasn’t met another man who is multi-orgasmic and her friends will be pretty jealous.

6) Know how to cook her a decent meal in the morning

If things do play out right, she’ll be there when you wake up.

There’s nothing sexier than whipping her up some fancy bacon and eggs while she strolls out of your room wearing just your button down. This may even get you booked for round two right on the breakfast table.

For awesome and easy egg recipes check out Steve Kamb’s post on fancy bacon and eggs.

The key here is to not be seen as trying super hard to impress her but just to be a sophisticated guy who does this kind of thing all the time. So make it seem like no big deal.

After she’s gone

So if you’ve done everything right and she’s out the door you should be pretty confident she’s going to be calling you soon.

But just to be sure, end the event with a kiss at the door as you send her on her way, and don’t be afraid to send her a text to make sure she got home alright. A survey found that 93% of women found this to be a sexy move.

And most importantly, enjoy the change in yourself that will result from making these changes. At first you may be acting out of the ordinary by doing these things, but eventually you will become this guy and this kind of stuff will be natural and common place.


If you enjoyed these dating tips subscribe to be notified of new posts. And check out this article, 100 ways to get a second date. If you can do each one of these, you are golden!

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