Freedom is one of the biggest values in people’s lives.
Rich Litvin, one of the world’s most accomplished high-performance coaches mentioned, that he found, after years of coaching experience, that the goal behind the goal was almost always freedom.
In my work as a professional coach, I see this pattern showing up over and over again – it seems that especially men have a big underlying desire for freedom.
The masculine is naturally more driven to create an impact, to DO something, to penetrate, to create something extraordinary.
In this article we explore what it would mean for you to step into your masculine power and how the majority of men don’t live up to their fullest potential and live in the prison of their own mind.
Stepping Into Your True Power
Freedom is such a broad word that can be linked to various areas of our lives. At the end of the day, freedom is more a state, an emotion than anything else. And that emotion has a direct impact on our behaviour.
Most of our actions are driven by a subconscious desire for freedom. Below I’ve listed the ones that we found to be the most common among men:
- The freedom to be who you truly are.
- The freedom to express yourself.
- The freedom to speak your truth.
- The freedom to love without boundaries and connect deeply with others.
- The freedom to do whatever YOU want to do.
- The freedom to create and to have an impact in this lifetime.
- The freedom to live from a place of inspiration and love rather than fear.
- The freedom to travel and to have an epic lifestyle.
- The freedom to break out of your limiting beliefs.
- The freedom to laugh, to be true to yourself, to enjoy life – to live life to the fullest.
In summary, it seems that freedom is to allow yourself to go for what YOU want without feeling ashamed or held back by limiting beliefs.
Living in a Prison of Mind
“You have the freedom to be yourself, your true self, here and now, and nothing can stand in your way.” – Richard Bach
Every man deserves to be free. That’s not only attractive to women, but it’s their core nature. Yet, we live in a society where men aren’t free and they mostly don’t live in integrity with themselves.
Isn’t that interesting? We live in a time where literally everything is possible. There were never more opportunities, there were never more choices – you can travel to almost every country you want to. Never has it been easier for the average-joe to create financial abundance.
And still people are not free… It seems that people lock themselves into a prison. A prison that is constructed in their own minds. It tells us what we can do and what we can’t.
Resistance Of Breaking Out Of Your Own Prison
If you watched the movie “Shawshank Redemption” you may got an idea about a very interesting fact of a prisoners-mind. After years being locked up – people often feel resistance to walk back into freedom on their release day.
Why is that?
It’s because the prison became their home. It’s their comfort zone. It’s where they feel safe.
Often there’s a desire and fear at the same time linked with ‘freedom’. That phenomenon creates an internal conflict and keeps people stuck in mediocrity. It’s the reason why most people take either lousy – or no action at all.
The human mind is afraid of the unknown. A reason why most people choose to stay in their comfort zone – even if they know that this state is not in alignment with their deep inner desire for freedom.
Inaction – The Silent Killer
We live in a society where people live in their own little prisons. They don’t speak their truth; they don’t live up to their true potential. They don’t even try. Often for their whole lives.
People chose to live in a prison, because it feels safe. Even though deep, deep down there is this urge for freedom that often gets supressed by a little voice in the head that tells you things like “You’re not good enough, unworthy, unloved, a failure…”
The feeling of not being free is painful. It’s a subtle pain… often not consciously recognised but at the same time, it’s a silent killer.
To cover that pain, especially men give in to habits such as porn, alcohol, drugs, internet-addiction, overeating… etc.
It’s a rabbit-hole that often leads to a frustrating, average life without making a real impact, without having ever truly lived.
Stepping Out Of Your Shadow
Good news is that everyone can make a decision to change that.
On our programs we have seen people changing their whole lives and the way they showed up to life.
You can literally create anything you want once you understand what’s creating the resistance within you.
“Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary” – Steve Jobs
As you may see, this really is a journey back to yourself.
The first step is to objectify what’s going on. To be aware of the patterns that hold you back from what you truly want.
Once we are aware of the patterns and subconscious beliefs we can make a conscious effort to change and to raise the standards. (There is an incredible talk from Joe Dispenza on how you can literally change your personality by changing your beliefs about this world – I will link his speech below.)
Fact is that YOU have a gift for this world. Sadly most often we hold back from sharing that ‘gift’, because we’re afraid of being rejected by others.
According to Tony Robbins, the 2 major fears are the fear of not being enough, and the fear of not being loved.
The paradox of it: By living up to those fears, we often create exactly what we are most afraid of. By not stepping out of the comfort zone, we create disconnection; we create an even deeper feeling of ‘not being enough’.
Stepping Into Freedom
Once you are aware of your patterns and how they hold you back from living a life that you truly want, it’s time to unlock your mental doors – that’s when you are stepping into your true power.
People who show up from a place of freedom are the ones that experience flow, the ones that connect the dots, that can love fully and deeply, the ones that live healthy and in integrity with themselves.
Living from a place of freedom means to know yourself. To own who you are. To be confident around women to express yourself and to be able to enjoy every moment that life offers to you.
People who choose to be free become role models to others. They step up and become attractive and inspiring individuals – without even trying.
What You Need In Order To Change
1. Commitment & Dedication
Every change needs courage. It feels uncomfortable at first. It stretches you. But that’s exactly when you know that you are growing stronger.
2. Being ‘Stronger’ Than Your Environment
Especially living in an environment that reminds us to our ‘old-self’ can hold people back from stepping into their true power. You have to be stronger than your environment.
3. Choosing Your Peers
I also can’t emphasise enough how important it is to choose the people are you spending most time with wisely.
4. Get Support
We have found that the easiest way for people to break out of their limiting patterns is to transform in a ‘neutral’ place.
It’s a phenomenon that changes lives. Last year I sat together with high-performance coach Tamas Bedo and we discussed about how people can create extraordinary changes in their lives. Tamas already has worked with Olympic athletes and some of the best poker players in the world and our insights from that conversation inspired us to create an extraordinary mastermind for men.
We created a program where we take 8 men to Bali through an incredible adventure of self-discovery.
Sam Ryter and Tamas Bedo take 8 selected men onto a transformative journey. Learn more here: http://www.backtofreedomretreat.com
It’s an adventure of a life-time and it’s designed for men who want to break free from their own prison in their head and live up to their full potential. The program also includes:
- Women, Dating, Relationships & Sex
- Owning Your Masculinity & Learning How To Go For What You Want
- ‘Really’ Getting To Know Yourself
- Finding A Deeper Sense Of Purpose
If you are interested in learning more about the retreat and in finding out if you would be a right fit for this program, then please click the link below: